u wake up on christmas morning and go downstairs, full of excitement. somebody is stealing all of your christmas presents. it is jesus. “its my birthday, not yours” he hisses menacingly, then runs away with all your gifts in his arms
|—||Me, after someone listed all the things that were wrong with a movie (via foxwin)|
I’d never, ever hurt a lady but I’d be happy to punch a feminist.
It’d bring me great joy.
I’m 6’2 and weigh 180lbs
ready when you are
The fact that I’ve known about this for a whole year now
me trying to leave tumblr
- if i have to ask for your attention then i don’t want it anyway
- if you’re not giving me attention i’ll get it from someone else
i hope the shower isn’t too toasty for you.
this is my favourite picture on the internet
I hope hundreds of years later this picture is found completely out of context by anthropologists and it’s the final tipping point before they completely give up on trying to understand the internet in this decade.
I don’t think Canadians are as friendly as they appear. They stab trees and feast on their blood.
I guess you could say it was…. Branching out…